u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
