it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
