Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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