Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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