tell your sister to shave her snatch
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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