He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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