One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
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So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
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i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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