Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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