I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
