I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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