I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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