Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Use "feeling words"
Yay
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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