Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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