So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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