i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
