Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
