Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
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