This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize