So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
