Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
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Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I have grass duct taped all over my body
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
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Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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