she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
