I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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