Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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