So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
