and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
