first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize