Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
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