well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
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