That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
