we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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