when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
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