I feel great
I just peed on a car
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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