I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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