you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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