When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize