one might say we're banned from that church
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
