whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
