Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize