it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.