I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
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I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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