remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
