It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
But break dance skills will only take you so far
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Congratulations! We have a period
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
