Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
