Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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