never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
