new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my penis look like a turkey
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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