also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
