R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Say something about gay babies.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
