did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Randomize
