Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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