The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Randomize
